Bad At Being Christian: A Sinner's Search For The Light
A recent encounter made me realize how bad I was at being Christian.
I enjoy the casual Tequila Tuesday more often than I should, I lived with my boyfriend for most of the time that we were together and my idea of church is rolling out of my bed in my PJs and taking notes on the 9am Joel Osteen service.
I am in no way holier than thou and I couldn't even pretend to be.
It's funny because before that encounter, I considered myself Christian with no question. For me, it was completely fine that I rarely see the inside of a church past Easter, as long as I continued to pray everyday and did my own self study and I saw living with my husband-to-be as completely normal, if not necessary.
If I am so bad at being Christian, why do I still call myself a Christian? Luckily, God isn't as judgmental as some of his followers.
Some people (based on my personal experience) define Christianity as going to church and not doing anything unholy, or at least not admitting to it. We sometimes fail to realize that leading by example as a Christian does not mean pretending to do everything right and judging others that don't cover up their sins as well as you do. Leading by example means admitting to be human and making an effort to relating to others.
I obviously do not do everything as a Christian by the black book...and I am realizing that this is okay. God knows that we are not perfect and doesn't expect us to be. The most important this about being Christian to me is the personal relationship that I have with God and that is something that no one can take away from me.
So, will I give up Tequila Tuesday? Not for now, and I believe that moving in with my boyfriend was the smartest financial and personal decision at the time.
I'll most likely make more of an effort to find a new church that is as good as the one in my hometown, but until then don't judge me as I go to church on my couch in my PJs.
Are you currently on a spiritual journey? What troubles have you found when comparing the tradition to your identity?